Thoughts in the shape of words.

Month: February, 2017

Standing by a Crossroad

-This is from my old notebook collection of assorted writings. I found a few old notebooks when I was visiting my father and this particular collection of words dates back to somewhere between late 2013 and early 2014, I think. When this was written a lot was happening around me and these words are something like a stream of consciousness regarding where you are going and what you are doing with your life.


You never said you didn’t know

What was going through my mind

I guess I’m just kinda’ slow

In letting others know what I find


Even as I keep on moving

It’s hard to comprehend

What is this wicked doing

Coming from around the bend


By my side there’s countless others

Whom also have been down

Many sisters and brothers

They are redemption bound


There’s something I must tell you

Something that’s been haunting me

I’ve been acting like a fool

Doing things you can’t believe


I’ve been looking back now

For quite some time

And I can’t figure out how

Just how I burned every dime


When I tell you it’s a pain

You’d better believe it’s true

I was hijacking my brain

Always walking with ragged shoes


So now I’m pledging to you

To help me start on another road

Someday it will be true

I’ll walk tall without my load


And I find hope in the little things

In the dawn of a new day

In the most spirited workers

Toiling their lives away


Now I seek your guidance

Asking you to assist

Pull me out of this deadly dance

Walk me out of the mist


I’m standing by a crossroad

Can’t decide where to turn

On my back’s a heavy load

Of all the bridges that I’ve burnt


It’s a sad story to be true

A bitter twisted tale

Something rightfully reserved by few

To live it and then walk away


I’ve sung with the choir of despair

I’ve travelled across the river of death

I’d tell you where I was going but I dont’t know where

I’m stopping soon to catch my breath


Guilty as Charged

Good day your holiness

I would like to confess

Declare my sins

Recognize my wrongs

And admit

Yes, I am guilty

I’ve made mistakes

Made people cry

I’ve been bad

I’ve misbehaved

Yes, I am guilty

To all of the above

I’ve insulted




And hated

I’ve been angry

And foolish

Out of my mind

And useless

So charge me

With all you’ve got

Yes, I am guilty

Guilty as charged

But so are you

And everyone else

We’re all guilty

Of being human




Never Again!

Never again I vowed

Would I balance on the edge

It’s too damn slippery

So easy to fall

But the excitement

And the adrenaline

And the memories

Of living outside of it

Of living honestly


Never again!


But still

The balancing act

Simply the thought of it

Makes my heart beat

Faster and faster

Running through the night

Watching the universe pass by

And almost touching the stars

Dancing on the rings of Saturn


Never again!


Ultimate freedom

Is chained down for us all

But if one gives it all one’s got

It’s possible to escape

If only for a while

It’s not about living on the run

It’s not about wasting away

Perhaps managing

Instead of balancing


Never again, never again!

To a Reader

I stand naked before you

Through the words you see

I pour out my soul

As a simple nobody


I tell my truth to your face

With the melody of my voice

A song to let go

And to simply rejoice


I roam the unknown to find

Just the right lines

That make you feel

The fire and joy

In your body and soul


I take you on a journey

Through phrases and dust

Unimaginable expressions

Lined with lust and disgust


I turn the page for you

Move you through time

In all directions imaginable

Make you fall and then climb


I roam the unknown to find

Just the right lines

That make me feel

The fire and joy

In my body and soul


The Feeling

There was a feeling I used to have

On the good days

Didn’t happen very often

But when it did

It felt like I could do anything

Take the whole world on by myself


I’ve had other feelings lately

But not that unique one

Then all of a sudden

The snow fell down

I felt a chill down my spine

And the feeling appeared again


A temporary moment of clarity

Or perhaps insanity

I don’t really care

Either way works

What does matter is the feeling

And the raw power it gave me


I have always worried a lot

Looking at the horizon

Daydreaming out the window

Trying to forget

That feeling’s what kept me alive

Through many a rough times


The near memory of the feeling

Is more than enough

To keep the old engine going

Down the road

I never knew how much I needed this

And it revitalizes the hope I’ve always needed